My Testimony Part 3

So I am sitting here watch Joel Olsteen speak on my TV.. WOW HIS MESSAGE WAS RIGHT ON... It was about removing labels that were given to you either by your family, friend, co-workers ect.  He said that scientists studies bumble bees and that the scientists have concluded that bumblebees can't fly be cause their bodies are too big and their wingspan isn't long enough. So therefore they can't fly.  Well because they can't hear what the scientists are saying.. THEY FLY.. BECAUSE GOD WANTS THEM TOO... AMEN.. I AM A BUMBLEBEE... I am gonna buzz around satan and sting him in his butt... lol That is what my blog is about.. how Jesus doesn't see me for who I used to be..  There is a saying.. That if you could see how God sees you.. and not everyone else... Your mind couldn't comprehend it..  And I also heard that when we get to our heavenly home.... My pastor Miles McPherson said that once we see what Satan really looks like, We are going to say "Really??? I was scared of you?"  So become that Bumblebee and stick him in the rearend!!  LOL Ok.. onto my blog.

So... I joined MySpace and after having my second son Jaden, I decided to get my breasts done.  After having two kids and losing so much weight I was left with skin.  I used to call them Cow Utters... lol.  It was a decision I made because I didn't like my body.  My mom was against it since she had breast cancer and had hers removed.  So she always told me not to do it.. until one day she asked to see them and as soon as I lifted my shirt she turned to me and said "They are going to be beautiful when they are done!".. So the next day I was under the knife. lol

 Now I am walking around with this new body 32DD style and WOW... That changed my life.. I was getting attention like you don't know. That is when I became Samantha from Sex In The City.. I actually lived her life.  I was that 30 something woman that lived like she was 21.  I had men eating out of the palm of my hands, money and still felt alone.. empty and sad..  Like I said I joined MySpace and and I was the bell of the ball!!!!! It fed my yearning to be accepted, I thought that hole in my heart.. again.. was gonna be filled.. LIE LIE LIE.. but I didn't know that then. I met a girl named Kathy Kaska at my job that started leading me to God..and then I met this guy James Ellis on MySpace and he is this good ole boy from Indiana.  He and I became friends.  I find out that he is a Christian and his family as well.  He would talk about God in ways I never heard.  God was a knocking.. and I slowly started opening the door without even knowing it.. .  Then through James I met this girl Kari Knisely and she too was Christian.  Now that I look back I laugh on how bad God wanted me.. He kept putting Christians in my life and I was like LA LA LA... now putting the puzzle together.

One day I went to a concert with Kari and my son Brandon.. It was a 4th of July Concert with all of these Rock Bands and I thought we were going to just listen to some good music.. so we are jamming to some POD, Kirk Franklin.. and the next thing I know.. I am on stage with Kari and my kid.. GETTING SAVED!!! I still didn't actually realize it until this woman had us sit down and pray with her.. then I looked around and said .. I just got SAVED?.. I am now a Christian??? I am now one of them?? PRAISE JESUS!!!! I FELT LIKE THAT SONG POD SANG "I FEEL SO ALIVE FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME"..  Now I know.. I am slow.. but I didn't realize that music was all about God.. and didn't even realize that Miles Mcperson was a pastor... I am polish so It takes me a while.. LOL

At that moment.. that hole in my heart was full.. I felt warm.. I felt safe.. I felt GLORIOUS.. Finally someone so unbelievable loved me... regardless of what I thought I was.. I didn't have to do backflips, drink myself to death, hurt myself to get HIS love.. HE just loved me...  I kept looking down to find this amazing love when I should of just been looking UP.. but HE got me just when I needed HIM.. and now I am HIS forever... I now have the DADDY I always needed...

So now I am on a glorious high.. and then BAM... My first trial... Satan found out that I am Christian and I am with my Lord.. and a target was put on my back... PUNK!!